How to Overcome the Feeling of Incompetency?

Feb 04, 2022
It is important to change your perspective and overcome self defeating beliefs by breaking the negative thought patterns

Do You Feel Stuck in Life?


“Worry, doubt, fear, and despair are the enemies which slowly bring us down to the ground and turn us to dust before we die.”

At some point in life, some of us might fall into the vicious cycle of negative events where we start doubting ourselves and our worth. There are a number of reasons that may elicit this feeling. It could be a series of bad relationships or our work environment, where time and again we are declared incompetent.

But this isn't the complete truth! Your worst enemy is YOURSELF.



Before doubting your luck or destiny, PAUSE and REFLECT and you will realize most of the time your sufferings are self-inflicted. What you feed your mind manifests into your reality. Remember, people treat us the way we perceive ourselves. Simply put, this world is a mirror; it will reflect the way you want yourself to be seen.



Human behavior is based upon internal and external patterns. Let’s explore these patterns in detail.


Internal patterns:

Our reality is a reflection of what we believe we deserve.

People unconsciously pick up the energy of how you treat yourself. They might not be able to articulate it, but their behavior generally reflects this. If you are more loving to yourself, you will be more loving to others; thus, you will attract loving people. This is true for most feelings.

Changes that are made inside out last forever.  Changing your internal pattern means you must change your perspective and stop blaming yourself for all the bad occurrences in your life.

This change takes time, effort, and a knowledgeable support system. This may include the assistance of a coach, a friend, or someone who has overcome similar challenges. Once you’ve embodied this new persona, next comes the EXTERNAL change.

External patterns:

Our success in life comes greatly from the people we surround ourselves with.

  • If you want to be successful, surround yourself with successful people.
  • If you want to be happy, surround yourself with happy people.
  • If you want to be more confident, surround yourself with confident people.

After you’ve changed your self-perception, now is the time to quit that troubling job or career or change your FRIEND CIRCLE (let that sink in…). Yes, it may sound selfish and mean; however, to break the negative thought pattern, you must change your company if that is what hinders positive change.

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”- Jim Rohn

Simply put, you think and act the way people around you do. Whether you agree or not, they influence our behavior! We need to disrupt our life and behaviors to create change.


To have a win-win situation where you don’t have to change your friends and still manage to influence your surroundings, enroll in a counseling program together! With the help of an expert, you all will grow together and eventually lead a happy satisfied life.

Moreover, the benefit of being a part of such programs is you will have a support group of people who've overcome similar challenges. They are striving to bring about a positive change, strongly believe in themselves, and are actively creating positive outcomes.

They will not only empathize with you, but also ensure you are not left behind in this journey because you have plugged yourself into an environment that will elicit POSITIVE CHANGE. 


The REAL question is What will you do to bring about positive change? How will you break the pattern?